{"id":246,"date":"2026-02-21T23:57:01","date_gmt":"2026-02-22T04:57:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.ambrcreations.net\/blog\/?p=246"},"modified":"2026-02-21T23:57:04","modified_gmt":"2026-02-22T04:57:04","slug":"my-home","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.ambrcreations.net\/blog\/my-home\/","title":{"rendered":"My Home"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Date Written: <\/strong>17 March 2016<\/em><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

It’s a constant struggle
To be the best version of myself
When all I have are your claws wedging themselves into my skin<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My actions confuse me
This weight of responsibility is slowly killing me<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Having to learn how to drive
When my fear of its unpredictability controls me
Having to take on the weight of others
Because no one else will
Having a friend that is poison to my being
Cling to my soul<\/p>\n\n\n\n

All this is driving me to my breaking point
But,<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When will I break?
How long will I last?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My happiness never lasts
There is this road block deep within my chest<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It grabs hold of my chin
Searing at my throat
My throat burns
My head hurts<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I feel so utterly, entirely alone
But at least I know others feel this way too
Because that’s really what its all about
Never me but always you, you, and you<\/p>\n\n\n\n

What is making me so depressed?
Why am I so down again?
Is it because of you, my poison?
Is it because I’m giving up on you, my future friends?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let the pain cycle through<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Everything is going right
Or, is it?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Maybe I’m just as lost as I was before
Maybe I never got unlost
Maybe I never have been found
Maybe I’m just unfound
Maybe I’m just forever overlooked<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I’m never the opened book
My contents are far too confusing
Far too grievous
Far too dark
Far too bright<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Far too scarred
When will someone see through my mask and actually do something about it?
When will someone genuinely care about my internal thoughts and contents?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hating myself yet again
It’s a never ending cycle
Continuing with now physical symptoms<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I wish I found my heart’s home
I wish I found my home
My home
My
Home<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Date Written: 17 March 2016 It’s a constant struggleTo be the best version of myselfWhen all I have are your claws wedging themselves into my…<\/p>\n

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