Date Written: 23 June 2022
Content Warning: This poem contains topics that may be sensitive to readers. Reader discretion is advised.
I am spiraling beneath my skin
Waiting for a new release to begin
So that I may be free of this internal contempt
I have chosen to keep myself in
I can feel my hands pulling away from my body
As they lay flat along the bed
It’s weird seeing ghostly hands in front of my eyes
As they reach for the ceiling above me
While I simultaneously see my physical hands lay idle beside me
I can feel myself sinking inward
I cannot escape this grip
My mind is splitting
It’s drawing more lines that must never be crossed
Yet I find I keep crossing them with time
I am losing myself in this reality
Feeling I have wasted my time and energy
Getting myself out of survival mode is tough
When it’s combatting with living mode, it is rough.
I am spiraling beneath my skin
I am splitting
I am falling
I am gripping
I am internally crying
For I do not wish to swim
In my own pool of fresh tears.
I am spiraling beneath my skin.
I do not know where else to go or begin.
I am spiraling beneath my skin.
Oh quicksand, how you once drew me in.
I am spiraling beneath my skin.
I’m feeling lost and powerless,
Where do I begin?